Like, how can you be so totally uncool, Low-Light?
  -- Satin (to Low-Light after receiving an invitation to a party)
Home Episode Summaries Season 2 Arise, Serpentor, Arise!: Part I

"Pacifists in G.I.Joe! What is happening to this outfit?"
- Beach Head (after overhearing Lifeline refusing to help repair a helicopter)

Wild Bill hits a foul off of Roadblock’s softball pitch and the ball lands on Shipwreck’s head while he is writing a letter to Sally, a woman who broke his heart with her last letter. General Hawk picks up the ball and tells Shipwreck that if a pop foul can beam him, he can beat Cobra can, too. Shipwreck stands at attention and salutes, and as General Hawk walks away, Beach Head asks if he was a too soft on Shipwreck. Flint explains that the Joes have seen quite a bit of combat and deserve some time to rest and relax.

Leatherneck and Wet-Suit taunt one another about their shooting skills while shooting at cardboard targets on the firing range, but they stop as they are awed when Low-Light and Sci Fi shoot the words “Top This” on one of the targets. “Come back on amateur night, clowns,” Low-Light tells the Joes.

Beach Head walks with the Joe command staff and he tells them that discipline is slipping, and his first example is Cross Country, who is installing a tape deck in his HAVOC. But Cross Country explains to the group that he always plays fighting music, the type he likes and everyone wants to punch him out so they can turn the tape deck off. Beach Head wishes he was in command so that he could makes some changes, but Flint reminds him that General Hawk, Duke and himself are in front of him in the command structure.

In a hanger, Lift-Ticket asks Lifeline for a crescent wrench so he can fix his helicopter, but Lifeline refuses since repairing a helicopter with guns goes against his principles. “Pacifists in G.I.Joe! What is happening to this outfit?” asks Beach Head. Soon, the command staff catch Slipstream watching TV.

At the St. Vitus Dance Academy, Cobra Commander notes that the Joes have become “soft and weak,” and Destro asks Scrap Iron if the last BAT (Battle Android Trooper) is ready. Placing a head on a body and turning a screw, Scrap Iron reports that he has assembled the last one. Cobra Commander then orders the BATs to move out and they march onto a bus under the supervision of a Motor Viper.

Mainframe and Dial-Tone compete against one another in a video game. General Hawk and his entourage enter the room and Beach Head asks what they are doing since they should be guarding the perimeter. Flipping through several screen, Mainframe explains to Beach Head that he learned that the best way to avoid the thousand yard stare in Vietnam was to occasionally divert his attention. But then he sees school buses on the perimeter and General Hawk orders the general quarters alert to be sounded.

General Hawk orders Duke to attack Cobra’s flank in order to prevent a pincer’s movement and then orders the Joes to fall back and make their stand at the airfield. Tomax and Xamot try to run over Sci Fi, Low-Light, Leatherneck and Wet-Suit, but they jump into a trench used by the pop up targets and shoot at the Stun as soon as it drives over them. Tomax and Xamot look back and note that the Joes are awfully poor shots.

Using barrels and other pieces of equipment on the airfield, the Cobra Stuns circle the Joes, who attempt to destroy the vehicles. Since the HISS tanks have more firepower, General Hawk wonders why Cobra Commander is using Stuns. The BATs are directed toward the Joes, who fire at the robots but still watch them advance.

Cobra Commander congratulates himself and orders all of the Stuns to attack, but the Crimson Guard Commanders suggest that he should keep a few Stuns in reserve. Cobra Commander ignores their suggestion and claims they are jealous of his military genius.

But he then spies a vehicle approaching from behind and diverts Stuns to intercept and destroy, but the Stuns are destroyed and Destro’s vehicle is knocked out of the way. General Hawk orders the Joes to prepare for hand-to-hand combat, but the man in the vehicle stops and leaps toward the BATs. General Hawk tells his men that Dial-Tone’s message for help must have been transmitted and enthusiastically points out Sgt. Slaughter has arrived. The Joes are shocked as they watch him tackle the BATs to the ground and destroy the robots with his fists.

Sgt. Slaughter calls out to the Joes and tells them that he could use their help. With their spirits renewed, General Hawk yells to the Joes: “Let’s take ‘em apart! YO JOE!” The Joes begin to pound on the Cobra agents and tear apart the BATs. Beach Head commandeers a Stun and attacks Cobra Commander, who quickly orders Cobra to retreat.

Part One - Part Two - Part Three

Jan 25: G.I.Joe Examined on Podcasts
Jan 25: Buzz Dixon Interview
Jan 25: Paulsen Annie Nomination & Dini on Batman Comic
Jan 12: Sgt. Slaughter Signing in Atlanta
Jan 11: G.I.Joe to Return on G4
Dec 30: Paramount Movie Reviewer Plugs
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