Aye, I’m MacIntosh, but I’m no hermit. I just live in an out of the way neighborhood.
  -- MacIntosh (scoffing the "hermit" part of his name given to him by Dusty)
Home Episode Summaries Season 1 Primordial Plot

"He must be a collector. They're desperate men."
- an archaeological dig leader (to a foreman curious about their attacker's identity)

As a doctor and his workers pull several 30 million old bones which have not undergone the fossilization process out of pools of oil, Wild Weasel flies his Cobra plane above the archeological dig and fires at the people on the ground. The men scatter and the doctor asks the foreman if they have paid off all of the government officials.

The foreman tells the doctor that they have made all the right bribes and Wild Weasel lands, picks up a few bones and flies away after placing a radio call to let Cobra headquarters know that the first part of the plan is complete.

Inside a building at Massey Laboratory, Dr. Massey stands behind a table and announces to the audience that they are about to find out whether they have accomplished a miracle or squandered their investors’ money. An egg inside a glass box cracks and Dr. Massey, who is standing behind the table, picks up a garden snake and declares the cloning project a success. However, Roberts, a Cobra agent who is wearing a communicator watch, signals a FANG and the Crimson Guard Commanders tell the FANG pilot to proceed.

Roberts strips off his lab coat in order to reveal his Crimson Guard uniform, congratulates Dr. Massey on behalf of Cobra, grabs the man and after the Cobra FANG destroys the wall behind Roberts, a net is dropped onto the pair and they are whisked away.

Under foggy skies, Scarlett, Gung Ho and Roadblock listen to Flint explain that the Intelligence Department believes that Cobra has an island in the South Pacific where experiments on cloning dinosaurs are taking place. Gung Ho scoffs at the idea of dinosaurs roaming the land again, however, Scarlett walks up to Gung Ho, places a hand on his shoulder and reminds him: “Cobra has an irritating habit of doing the impossible.” Roadblock counters that the dinosaurs will need at least 30 years to grow up and become dangerous, which is just in time for the Joes’ retirement. Airtight enters the room and burns down Roadblock’s attempts at levity as he tells the Joes that Dr. Massey has also developed a rapid growth serum, and Roadblock is so impressed and worried that he replies, “Whoa! Instant monster.”

Deep Six radios Flint that he has found a weird island that is not on the map. Flint tells Deep Six that the entire planet has been mapped, but a Cobra Rattler appears and Deep Six dives into the ocean. Flint promises to send help before Deep Six can say - “Over and out,” Deep Six says, beating Flint to his own reply.

Radar dishes swivel, missile launchers turn and Crimson Guards drive Cobra Ferrets on the island. Inside a base, Destro looks at the bug-infested swamp and listens to Cobra Commander tell him that the world was once ruled by reptiles and will soon be again, but the reptile in power will be Cobra. Destro turns from the windows and explains that he doesn’t see any wisdom in Cobra Commander’s plan, but Cobra Commander turns to Tomax and Xamot, who explain that they have acquired the bones and one “slightly used scientific genius in a disposable container.” As the twins laugh at their joke, Cobra Commander tells Dr. Massey that he has enough bones to create an infinite number of dinosaurs and suggests that the doctor start right away. “Infinity is a very big number,” Cobra Commander adds.

Gung Ho, Scarlett and Flint each fly a Skystriker to search for the island and Gung Ho believes they have found the place since the island looks weird to him. While Dr. Massey scraps the bones under the watchful eyes of Destro and Cobra Commander, an alarm in the base is heard as the Joes fly over the island. Cobra’s missile defense shoot down the Skystrikers and Gung Ho and Scarlett bail out. However, Flint is unable to eject because his controls are locked.

Part One - Part Two - Part Three

Jan 25: G.I.Joe Examined on Podcasts
Jan 25: Buzz Dixon Interview
Jan 25: Paulsen Annie Nomination & Dini on Batman Comic
Jan 12: Sgt. Slaughter Signing in Atlanta
Jan 11: G.I.Joe to Return on G4
Dec 30: Paramount Movie Reviewer Plugs JoeGuide.com

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