Loud, clear and ugly, Colonel Sharpe.
  -- Duke (confirming that he heard Cobra's latest nefarious scheme)
Home Episode Summaries Season 2 Iceberg Goes South


"What are you clowns doing up there?!"
- Wet-Suit (after a rocket explodes near him)


Crossing the Arctic landscaping on foot, Iceberg stops and turns around to watch an approaching helicopter pilot shoot a seal with a gun. The helicopter pilot lands and Iceberg runs towards the seal and yells, “Start explaining, sister-!”

However, the female pilot cuts the Joe’s exclamation short and calmly replies that the seal was shot with a tranquilizer dart. As she pulls back her hood, Mahia jokingly tells Iceberg that he has spent too much time in the wilderness. Recognizing Mahia, Iceberg immediately and happily shouts her name before asking, “You came all the way from Jamaica to see me?”

“Partly,” she replies, and then adds that she is collecting tissue samples for her uncle, who is working inside a tropidome that has been stable for 13 weeks. Mahia is surprised that Iceberg hasn’t heard the news, but the Joe explains that he has been on his own testing survival gear for the past four months. After lamenting that they each have their own chores, Mahia listens to Iceberg joke about getting some polar bear genes.

But Mahia is not amused and harshly tells Iceberg, “Don’t even joke about that, man.” Iceberg quickly apologizes and asks if anything is troubling her. Citing fatigue and low-blood sugar in a weary voice, she tells Iceberg that a killer whale is her next target for tissue samples.

After Iceberg explains that seals are a whale’s “favorite munchies,” the ground begins to rumble and a killer whale crashes through the icy floor and heads toward Iceberg, Mahia and a seal, who run for cover. The whale follows them to a dead end in a small ice canyon and Mahia tells the Joe to keep the whale busy so that she can get a tissue sample.

Mahia extracts the tissue from the whale, who is so surprised by the pain that it chases Mahia back toward her helicopter. However, she hops onto a small chunk of ice and leaps again to another mass in order to escape by helicopter. But as she rises into the sky, the whale crashes through the ice floor and nearly strikes the helicopter.


“You’re crazy!” Iceberg yells at Mahia, who is hovering over him. However, she holds out her tissue extraction gun and replies that she got her sample. Iceberg’s “bubble boot” was damaged in the battle with the whale, so he promises to brew her a cup of his best tea for a lift back to the base, which is but a mere 20 minutes away by helicopter.

At the Joes’ Arctic Environmental Research Base, Snow Job angles a Snow Cat past several APCs and is challenged by Lady Jaye, who is driving a Polar Battle Bear, to a race to the target range. Snow Job quickly accepts, but fires a rocket at the target in order to win the race. The icy floor explodes and Wet-Suit yells, “What are you clowns doing up there?!”


Lady Jaye helps him out of the water and asks if he is okay. Unfortunately, his performance monitor, which was tracking the progress of his own equipment test, was destroyed and can not be replaced before the Joes leave. Lady Jaye warns Wet-Suit that Beach Head is not offering extensions, however, the Navy Seal asks anyway. And Beach Head denies Wet-Suit’s request, but he is convinced to let Wet-Suit to continue his equipment tests until Iceberg returns.


Outside Beach Head’s office, Iceberg tells Mahia “Ah, fickle is the friend / who won’t share tea at journey’s end.” However, Mahia is not impressed by the poetry and tersely tells him that she has work to do. As she flies away in her helicopter, a test tube filled with the seal tissue falls out of the helicopter. But Iceberg catches it and tells himself, “That woman is crazy.”


Wet-Suit asks Iceberg about Mahia, however, the Joes’ arctic expert replies that she was someone who just brushed him off. He also notes that the strange part about the whole incident is that she went through a great deal of trouble to gather a tissue sample and then tosses it away. Wet-Suit suggest she is being coy, however, Iceberg dismisses the possibility and decides to turn in his report and then visit her at the tropidome. After explaining that the Joes will immediately leave after Iceberg turns in his report, Wet-Suit offers to turn in Iceberg's papers while the Joes' arctic expert travels on a Polar Battle Bear to the tropidome.

Mahia lands her helicopter inside the tropidome, however, while standing outside the entrance to a lab, she is attacked by a creature with long claws. As she struggles to free herself, Dr. Mindbender exits the lab and points a gun at Fritz, the creature who attacked Mahia. After the creature explains it wasn’t going harm her, Mahia tells Dr. Mindbender that he is losing control, but Cobra’s mad scientist explains that he is in control of the experiment and her uncle, Dr. Wendigos.

Dr. Mindbender visits a lab where several half-Cobra-agent/half-walrus creatures are being fed by Dr. Wendigos, who explains that Cobra’s experiments are moving at a reckless pace. But Dr. Mindbender reminds him that he agreed to let Cobra subsidize his experiments in order to bypass years of research in days. And then adds that the next batch of experiments will be finished in hours.


Meanwhile, Iceberg arrives at the tropidome, but he is not allowed inside due to the experiments. Determined to see Mahia, the Joe begins to build an igloo, however, Dr. Mindbender decides to use the Joe in his experiments and orders the Cobra wolfmen to capture him. While reading The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire, Iceberg senses trouble and reaches for his gun, but a furry hand smashes through the icy wall and grabs him.

The Cobra wolfmen, who swiftly destroy the igloo and capture Iceberg, are ordered by Dr. Mindbender to escort the Joe inside the tropidome.

Part One - Part Two - Part Three


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