Hey! It ain’t like he flushed it down the sewer.
  -- Shipwreck (to Lady Jaye after Dr. Mullaney places a formula inside his subconscious)
Home Episode Summaries Season 2 Cobrathon


"NO! I cannot continue with this idiotic drivel!"
- Destro (after trying to tell a joke on TV)

While the Joes wait for Dial-Tone to install the decoder box, Destro complains about taking pledges to Cobra Commander. While Sci Fi and Lifeline hang on to the hub of the wheel, the audience begins to boo, forcing the Baroness to order the guards to stop the Joes. A Viper and his compatriot rush to Sci Fi’s wheel and one of them pokes Sci Fi with a long pole, however, Sci Fi kicks the two out of the way while spinning around, and a television producer yells at the operators in the control room to go to stand by.


After Dial-Tone activates the cable decoder box at Joe headquarters, General Hawk and the others find only a blue screen with the words “Please stand by.” Since Dial-Tone reported that Cobra’s signal originated somewhere in Nevada, Flint suggests that Cobra must be in Reno or Las Vegas since the Baroness stated that Cobra was “keeping with their surroundings” while torturing their teammates.


Hawk orders the Joes to investigate every television station in the state while the Baroness returns to the screen, promises the audience that the Joes will be tortured and apologizes for the interruption.

She introduces Destro who, instead of stating the objective of the Cobrathon, begins to tell jokes that are written on cue cards, which no one in the world finds funny except the French.

“Aaaargh - NO! NO! I cannot continue with this idiotic drivel!” Destro shouts before he pulls out a gun and destroys the cue cards. “Aah...That’s better.” He introduces Dr. Mindbender, who explains that the computer virus in the FBI computers will reach critical mass when the pledge board reaches five billion dollars.

Within minutes, the computers at Scotland Yard and other INTERPOL agencies will also be ruined.


Flint, who is inside a Conquest X-30 and has been watching the broadcast, explains to Dial-Tone and Low-Light that they have a billion dollars of time until the virus is activated.

While Dial-Tone and Flint walk through a casino in one of the hotels, a woman, who is ecstatic to have found a member of the G.I.Joe team, asks for Dial-Tone’s autograph. However, Flint moves her hand off of Dial-Tone’s shoulder and tells her, “Later, sister.” After Flint berates Dial-Tone about finding a date on his own time, Low-Light explains that he examined the hotel’s studio and found nothing while they were romancing the locals.

The Joes leave the hotel and walk past the Dreadnoks, who are buried in the shadows. Buzzer contacts the Baroness and explains that the Joes are headed toward the Coconut Palms, Cobra’s television station. After the Baroness taunts the Dreadnoks by stating that they have boasted how powerful they are in conversation, Buzzer rises to the challenge since he and the Dreadnoks have a few debts to settle with the Joes.

Mainframe explains to General Hawk that they may be able to stop the virus by destroying the Cobra computer that will deliver the phone calls, but he will first need to decipher the code on the sheet of paper that Beach Head snagged. General Hawk orders Mainframe to “get cracking” while the Dreadnoks follow the Joes in Nevada and attack. Flint orders the Joes to hit the dirt, and they all scramble for cover and return fire with their sidearms.


Dial-Tone doesn’t recognize the Cobra agents so he asks and learns from Flint that they are collectively known as the Dreadnoks, and Low-Light adds they have probably been hired to work as security for the Cobrathon before he shoots a concrete ceiling above the Dreadnoks, which collapses and buries the mercenaries.


The Joes enter the hotel, where Thrasher and Zartan explain to the audience that talented young criminals can afford Cobra’s elite academy thanks to the generous contributions from the viewers.


Part One - Part Two - Part Three


Jan 25: G.I.Joe Examined on Podcasts
Jan 25: Buzz Dixon Interview
Jan 25: Paulsen Annie Nomination & Dini on Batman Comic
Jan 12: Sgt. Slaughter Signing in Atlanta
Jan 11: G.I.Joe to Return on G4
Dec 30: Paramount Movie Reviewer Plugs JoeGuide.com
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