Like, how can you be so totally uncool, Low-Light?
  -- Satin (to Low-Light after receiving an invitation to a party)
Home Episode Summaries Season 1 The Gods Below

"Just what I need - an asp in my ear."
- Duke (inside the tomb of Osiris)

Sitting on a cobra-styled throne, Cobra Commander tells Dr. Marsh that he has made an impressive find: the discovery of a tomb for the Egyptian god Osiris, which contains enough gold to help finance Cobra’s purchase of weapons. Dr. Marsh stutters his thanks and tells Cobra Commander that the tomb will be filled with traps around every corner, and the Baroness walks over to Dr. Marsh, strokes his chin and asks, “Is that so?” Dr. Marsh then nervously adds that the Egyptian government is on their way to the tomb and that Cobra will not be able to beat them.

Cobra Rattlers and Ferrets attack the Egyptian government’s convoy of tanks and trucks and Cobra Commander tells Dr. Marsh that nothing is impossible for Cobra. And the Crimson Guards drive the still functioning tanks and trucks to the tomb. Dr. Marsh explains to Cobra Commander that he hasn’t a clue where the treasure is hidden, but the Baroness pokes Dr. Marsh in the ribs with a coiled whip and tells him that he will discover the treasure since his life depends on it.

Inside compartments located under the trucks, Duke tells the Joes to give the Cobra “Yahoos” the party of their lives. The doors swing open and the Joes roll out and take aim, however, Cobra is not present. Believing their foes have walked into the tomb, Duke, Lady Jaye, Alpine, Bazooka and Barbecue walk inside and Cobra Commander appears behind rocks near the tomb and tells the Baroness that Cobra will seize the treasure from the Joes and that the Joes will also spring all of the traps.

Barbecue lights a torch and Bazooka finds on a wall several hieroglyphics, which he joyfully calls “funnies.” Lady Jaye tells the Joes that they don’t have time to translate, but her intuition tells her that the message is probably not a good one. The Joes turn to walk away and two statues shoot spears at the Joes. They duck and the spears land inside two holes in the wall. A trap door drops down at the end of the passage and another slides to the ground after Bazooka blows away it away. The Joes run to the other end of the passage as a set of doors begins to close, but they all fall into a hole in the ground and slide down a tunnel into another room.

Alpine asks if they should make the room one for sewing or a nursery, but Duke tells Alpine to knock off the comedy and the Joes watch more doors slide open, and they walk through. At the entrance to the tomb, Cobra Commander finds a hole in a wall and whispers to the others that he can hear everything the Joes are saying. Dr. Marsh explains the conduits were designed to carry air to the workers in the lower levels. The Baroness reminds Cobra Commander that the Joes could probably hear them as well, so Cobra Commander covers the hole with both hands and causes a noise that piques Bazookas interest. But Alpine replies that the noise was just the foundation settling. “After 5,000 years?” asks Barbecue.

Lady Jaye reads a stone panel in the room and tells Duke that the tomb is for Osiris, who was killed by his brother, Set. Osiris was resurrected by Isis, his wife, however, Osiris believed that his true place was in the Land of the Dead and the tomb is a gateway. Suddenly, Lady Jaye notices a snake near Duke and he tells her, “Just what I need - an asp in my ear.” In a lightning swift move, Duke grabs the snake’s head, tosses it to the ground and watches the reptile slither away.

Duke asks Alpine to draw out his rope so that the Joes can climb out and the Joes soon find themselves wondering down a hallway that is cutoff by a stone door dropping down from the ceiling. After Bazooka destroys the wall with his bazooka, the Joes duck as bats stream out of the hallway.

The Joes walk into another room with a dead end and just as Bazooka offers to blow yet another hole in a wall, the circular room begins to spin. Pinned to the wall by the centrifugal force, the Joes are then hurled into a room without a door. As Lady Jaye disgustedly notes another dead end, Cobra Commander tells the Joes via the conduit system that since they are no longer any use to him, he will allow Scrap Iron the pleasure of firing several heat sinking missiles from a Stinger at the Joes. Cobra Commander nods to the Baroness who raises her hand to signal Scrap Iron, but Lady Jaye tells the eavesdropping Cobra Commander that she can’t believe they are going to die and with so much treasure.

Cobra Commander throws down his hand but immediately tackles the Baroness before she signals Scrap Iron to fire. She is unconvinced that the Joes have found the treasure, but Cobra Commander, who does not want to take any chances, orders several Crimson Guards to go into the tomb and investigate. But after they destroy the wall in front of the Joes, the Cobras find an empty room but the Joes move a stone floor panel to the side and attack the Crimson Guards.

Part One - Part Two - Part Three

Jan 25: G.I.Joe Examined on Podcasts
Jan 25: Buzz Dixon Interview
Jan 25: Paulsen Annie Nomination & Dini on Batman Comic
Jan 12: Sgt. Slaughter Signing in Atlanta
Jan 11: G.I.Joe to Return on G4
Dec 30: Paramount Movie Reviewer Plugs
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