No tipping, please.
  -- Cobra robot consignor (to the Joes after introducing the Cobra Cuties)
Home Episode Summaries Season 1 Lasers in the Night


"You spent millions on this?! -- this cosmic grahitti?!"
- Destro (upon learning Cobra Commander's latest plan, carving his own face into the moon with a laser)

Cobra Commander shows Destro his new laser, which has the Joes’ guidance system, and is interrupted when a Cobra scientist sees Amber in a vent. Two Crimson Guards capture Amber and as she is brought out to face Cobra’s leaders, she sees Lady Jaye, who tells Amber that she works for Cobra. Ripping off her mask, Lady Jaye is revealed to be the Baroness, who calls Amber fool since the Baroness was able to steal the laser guidance system without being detected and was able to turn the Joes’ attention to Amber.

Quick Kick flies to Snake Island in a Dragonfly, finds Amber’s raft and continues to search for her. Amber is taken to a prison cell and meets the real Lady Jaye as well as Gung Ho. Explaining that Cobra Commander has “a laser machine” and is about to do something terrible, Amber watches Gung Ho struggle with the chains and then chops them in half since Quick Kick could in the exhibition.

Quick Kick lands the helicopter after seeing Cobra Commander’s laser hit the moon’s surface and climbs down a ladder before kicking a few Cobra agents off a platform. He enters the control room, evades the laser whips and watches them become knotted.

“I love it when a plan comes together!” he shouts. Swinging on light fixtures and kicking his way past the agents, Quick Kick is captured by several laser whips as soon as he stops, picks up the laser whip handle and tries to turn it on. Cobra Commander then reveals his plan - to carve his face in the moon.

Destro is shocked and angirly asks Cobra Commander: ”You spent millions on this?! -- this cosmic grahitti?!”

Since the guard doesn’t see the Joes in the cell, he goes inside, tosses down a tray of food and demands that Amber tell him where the other prisoners went. And Gung Ho and Lady Jaye fall from the rafters in the ceiling and Gung Ho knocks the guard out. Lady Jaye picks up the guard’s rifle and they run to the control room in order to stop Cobra Commander.

When Quick Kick sees that Amber is alive, he kicks the guard, who loses control of the whips coil around Quick Kick. The two embrace and Quick Kick tells an impressed Amber that since there were no good movies on, he decided to rescue her. Cobra Commander orders his troops to attack and Quick Kick knocks three agents with one kick. Destro and the Baroness retreat and Cobra Commander follows yelling at them to wait for him.


Quick Kick tells the Joes to follow him as he chases the Cobras, who escape Cobra FANGS. Quick Kick and Amber board the Dragonfly and chase the trio of Cobras, and Cobra Commander fumes that everyone is against him after Destro calls him a fool due to the loss of Snake Island.

Quick Kick tells Amber that she should have stayed behind, but she explains that she didn’t want to miss the action. “Amber, what am I going to do with you?” Amber shouts for Quick Kick to watch out for Destro, but the Cobra agent shoots the tail off the Dragonfly and tells the lovebirds to say their prayers.

Inside the crashed Dragonfly, Quick Kick rests his head in Amber’s lap and tells her that he must be in Heaven since he is in the arms of an angel. “You soon will be if you don’t run like the Devil,” Amber says. The two run out of the helicopter and avoid Destro’s shots, but Amber freezes as snakes begin to slither up her legs. “That’s what you gotta face if you’re a Joe,” Quick Kick tells her before pulling out the laser whip and destroying the landing rails on Destro’s FANG and pulling the snakes off her.


Amber embraces Quick Kick and tries to kiss him, however, Quick Kick tells her, “Not now!” And the two dive for cover and watch Skystrikers arrive, and Duke and two others help chase the Cobra forces away.


Back at Joe headquarters, Duke apologizes for pegging Amber as a spy, but she doesn’t think it’s necessary since everything she did was wrong. Duke then explains that if she would like to join the Joe team, they would be happy to have her aboard. Extremely excited, Amber states that she would like to join more than anything in the world. However, she has had enough excitement for one night. “Maybe after I finish school?” she asks Duke. “Anytime, Amber,” Duke replies half-laughing, “Anytime.” With fists in the air, Amber watches as all of the Joes cheer: “YO JOE!”

As Amber rests her head against Quick Kick's chest, he tells her that he did a little fix-up work on the moon and asks what she thinks. Looking up and seeing two dots and a semi-circle, a simple happy face which is part of a roadside advertisement, Amber tells Quick Kick, “Oh, Jerry, don’t ask for the moon. We have the stars.”
Quick Kick: “Jerry?! Who’s Jerry?”
Amber: ”I’m doing Bette Davis from the movie Now Voyager.”
Quick Kick: “Huh?”
Amber: “Oh, Quick Kick, what am I going to do with you?”

Part One - Part Two - Part Three


Jan 25: G.I.Joe Examined on Podcasts
Jan 25: Buzz Dixon Interview
Jan 25: Paulsen Annie Nomination & Dini on Batman Comic
Jan 12: Sgt. Slaughter Signing in Atlanta
Jan 11: G.I.Joe to Return on G4
Dec 30: Paramount Movie Reviewer Plugs JoeGuide.com
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