Home Episode Summaries Season 1 The Greenhouse Effect
"Hey, my momma didn’t raise no mountain goat."
- Wild Bill (to Alpine, who asked if the other Joes are going to follow him down a rocky cliff)
Behind a glass window, an engine is shut off and a man in a white trenchcoat
announces to the Joes, Alpine, Bazooka, Wild Bill and Barbecue, that they
are witnessing a historical moment. “Yeah,” Alpine says sarcastically,
“he just invented the world’s biggest Roman candle.” Waking up from his
nap while standing, Bazooka asks Alpine, “Really?”
Barbecue plucks the clipboard from Dr. Bullock’s hand, pushes the doctor
aside as he tries to grab back his board, turns to the Joes and explains
that the newest nitrogen-based fuel compound burns much more cleanly and the user
will be able to derive more miles per gallon.
Inside a broom closet, Crimson Guard number nine report to Cobra Commander
that he has found the formula but has not stolen it. Cobra Commander orders
him to get the fuel and does not care if there are members of the Joe team
in the building. Turning off his radio, the slightly overweight janitor
pushes the cart out of the closet and proceeds to the laboratory, where
two mechanical arms remove the canister containing the fuel from the engine
and place it inside a refrigerator.
As Crimson Guard number nine enters the room, Dr. Bullock asks him how
he was able to pass the security on the floor since the lab is in a restricted
area. However, the janitor stutters, knocks over a bucket of water and
incurs Dr. Bullock’s wraith. The Joes laugh and walk over to the Crimson
Guard to try and help him, but the janitor throws a bucket and Barbecue
steps inside of it and falls over. The Crimson Guard swings the wet strings
of the mop into Alpine’s face and garbs the rocket fuel. Wild Bill yells
at the other Joes to grab the “buckaroo” and the Crimson Guard jumps onto
a table.
Dr. Bullock promises to report the janitor to his supervisor, but the
Crimson Guard replies, “Good luck! My supervisor is Cobra.” The Cobra agent
jumps up from the table, grabs a light hanging down from the ceiling and
begins to swing, however, Alpine grabs his legs and tries to pull him down
while asking the Crimson Guard if he always wished to be in the circus.
Bazooka grabs a trash bin and holds it as if he ready to capture the
Crimson Guard after Alpine pulls him down, but the Crimson Guard throws
Alpine into the trash bin and Alpine crashes through a window. The Cobra
agent dismounts from the lights, flies through the window and slides down
a rocky hill as the Joes pursue him. As Alpine begins to climb down the
hill, he asks why the other Joes are not following him. Wild Bill tells
him, “Hey, my momma didn’t raise no mountain goat.” Bazooka follows his
friend down the hill, but he stumbles and causes Alpine and himself to
tumble to the bottom.
The Cobra agent, who skidded to the bottom of the hill, runs to a nearby
town and enters a greenhouse as soon as he sees the Joes riding down the
street on Silver Mirage motorcycles, which picked up Alpine and Bazooka
at the bottom of the hill. The owner of the greenhouse, Harvey Lathrop,
reports the presence of the intruder to the police and adds that he knows
the difference between a person and a banana plant. The police yell at
Harvey that they only handle real emergencies.
Outside the greenhouse, sirens blare and two police officers enter the
greenhouse after the Crimson Guard places the rocket fuel canister into
a plant pot. The two police officers enter the greenhouse and are surprised
that there actually someone inside since Harvey has made 187 false alarm
phone calls. The Crimson Guard rushes forward, kicks, punches and tosses
the guards to the ground.
As the Cobra agent laughs and thanks the cops for the workout, Harvey
drops a pot on the Cobra agent and knocks him out while apologizing to
the plant that he removed from the pot. While Harvey concludes that the
intruder was obviously after his secret plant food formula, the police
officers awaken and drag the Cobra agent out of the greenhouse, listen
to Harvey thank them for their swift attention and one of the officers
tells Harvey, “Don’t mention it.” While the other policeman adds, “Please
don’t mention it.”
Harvey sprays his superfood formula on the plants and tells the plants
that the bad man is gone and that they can calm down. He also explains
that his super-grow formula will make him famous at the county fair and
then no one will laugh at him again. As soon as he leaves, the rocket fuel
canister begins to leak a gas into the greenhouse and the plants begin
to grow at an accelerated rate.
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